Monday, 31 December 2012

Top Beer & Pub Tweets Autumn/Winter 2012

Like the Season itself we get under way with a cold, hard truth

We are all just 2 hangovers away from Monday

There's a guy in the pub reading Molière, wearing a Pinter tshirt and laughing aloud at the book. He seems like a really well read penis

Two ninjas walk into a bar. Or do they?
Two new mums have brought their screaming babies into the pub. If I wanted this shit I'd have myself a Facebook account.
Having a pop at F*c*b**k on Twitter is always an easy laugh, but some genuine insight here
New resolution: to earn some of the more obscure UNTAPPD Badges. I'll see your "stout day" and raise you a "you're a dumb drunk" badge.

This one might be a bit more controversial, but these badges do clutter up the timeline you know

Taking the bikes/beer relationship to the next level

People who peel labels off beer bottles are 5 times more likely to turn out to be satanists. Avoid them.
I soak mine first and then peel to make the bottles more recycle friendly so I'm OK, right?

TSA are doing a Meet the Brewer right now at Henglers. First person to ask him "Have you ever heard of hops?" wins a pint.
Will had a few gems live from that TSA/Henglars event, check the timeline and take your pick

Heard of food and beer pairing?, well here is a Book and Beer pairing


Bud Light Lime, because regular Bud Light didn't taste like shit enough.
Checked, this is a real thing...Yeah, I know

I could relate more to young money rappers if they all went broke and got fat on craft beer. 
Wait till they hit 40, then they'll catch on
18) So Ken, just how small are the Lanarkshire Wetherspoons concessions?
aye. It's very small. More a tea spoons than a table spoons. Ta Boom Tish! 

Boy, I intend to have the Red Eye Mocha Porter boy.....even if it is to be burglary
Fantastic Night in Laurieston. Great beers, great people, great evening and no here today, gone tomorrow hipsters.
And it hadnt even turned 730, I know that because when I read that tweet I was fitting bartape to my fixie             
If you are in our tasting room this weekend and happen to dig sours, give the bartender the special wink...tap #6 is Sour Project...
Lots of gentlemen in 'regalia' in Oxford Bar this afternoon. As one of them stumbled, barman cried 'Masonry falling!'...
Walked into Babbity Bowsers then straight out, epic festering cheese smell not conducive to good times...
A level of detail you just don't get in the GBG

People act like they've never seen anyone pour beer into their coffee mug in the break room. Lighten up.

If you drunk eat your breakfast before going to bed you can avoid a hangover AND be the fattest alcoholic in your neighborhood.
This guys advice should come with a health warning, because although it is in the cold, hard, sober light of day clearly absurd it has been cleverly designed to appeal to drunken logic

All 3 tips came in today on the stick that in yer pipe you bookie bassas. Off for a celebratory half of mild and some crab sticks
Modesty in scale from one of my fav punting tipster

A group of fonts walk into a pub . ‘Get out of my pub!’ shouts the barman. ‘We don’t serve your type in here.’

Sometimes I like to pop over to the house opposite my pub.                

I nearly fell over after being charged 6.20 for 2 pints of 7.1% beer and after I drank them I nearly fell over..

Lagerboy fermentation smelling like pint of pain, your gain. 
Often imitated but seldom beaten: the Drinking, Mostly
Brewery dray pic of the season courtesy of  @Speysidebrewery
Couple of music / Beer crossovers coming up
Bollocks - the Everlode is gone from Dada - I feel a descending emotional string glissando from a Mahler symphony : ((((

Charles Aznavour - I Drink. Love these lyrics, they're brutal ! "I drink for... our sterile embraces in the tomb of your bed" - Don't hold back Charles! Tell her what you really think...
That is cold. Here is an alternative take on the place of drink in Romance

I measure love by how many pints it takes me to say it to you out loud. 

Top spot this month goes to the Bard of the Laurieston. Had over a dozen belters under this hashtag so check out his timeline to see why so far ahead of this session's competition  
"I've got a brick here, do you want a shot of it ?"